Sollicitudo Alter Ego

The heart of Worship to God is surrender. Not the music, tune or dancing or even expression. But the heart itself, is it really comes after God? The moment i decided to surrender all my steps to God, He granted me in few places and condition (so far) which i may prefer to say no and or deny. I really want to shout : Why God? Me? There? That Job, not other? I did ask, but in honest heart of quoestioning. I told God what in side my heart said. But, i hold my mouth and heart to ask these difficulties away. I may not remember to pray every day, but i do keep Him in every decision and moment to share with. I told Him , that i am so sad. I cried privately only with Him. Being honest is also the part of surrender to God, without any tension to interfere. At this moment, I may not understand why and what happened to me.  I may confused of what to do, but I only believes in one thing. That i surrender to God, He knows the best for me. He plans all the good and best things ...

Living in a jungle is not a common way of living for everyone. Some would survive, and even creates own community. While some other, would feels like that is the end of living. Jungle has its own rule for each person who dares to step in. You follow and obey it, you live. Disobedience will leads you to dreadfull even dying.. And there, jungle is not only about a place somewhere in the middle of nowhere. It's everywhere, since you open your eyes and breath in your awakening air, you are already in the jungle. Why? The closest neighbour perhaps is just another species for you. Because you never wanted to talk and share, even you may think the people next door is a disturbance. Similar with real jungle, living in what we call "place" is also fills with those who are strong and those who are not. There are tribes, who ready to figth for living, struggling to prevent their "area" from being ruled by enemies. As green jungle full of trap, caused by na...

I go east, but He is not there. I go west, but i cannot find Him. I do not see him in the north, for He is hidden. I turn to the south, but I cannot find Him. But He knows where I am going. And when He has tested me like gold in a fire,,, He will pronounce me innocent.

You are who you are for a reason. You're part of an intricate plan. You're a precious and perfect unique design, Called God's special woman or a man. You look like you look for a reason. Our God made no mistake. He knit you together within the womb, You're just what He wanted to make. The parents you had were the ones He chose, And no matter how you may feel, They were custom-designed with God's plan in mind, And they bear the Master's seal. No, that trauma you faced was not easy. And God wept that it hurt you so; But it was allowed to shape your heart. So that into his likeness you'd grow. You are who you are fro a reason. You've been formed by the Master's rod. You are who you are, beloved, Because there is a GOD!.. This poem by Russell Kelfer